[Scene #53]
Harry : Right. Back at three. Christmas shopping, never an easy or a pleasant task.
Mia : Are you going to get me something?
Harry : Er... I don't know, I hadn't thought. Where's Sarah, by the way?
Mia : She couldn't make it in today. Family thing.
Harry : There's a word for hangover I've never heard before. See you later.
Mia : Yes. Looking forward to it. A lot.
Harry : (calls Mia) So, Are you going to give me something?
Mia : I thought I made it clear last night. When it comes to me, you can have everything.
Harry : So, erm, what do you need? Something along the stationery line? Are you short of staplers?
Mia : No. I don't want something I need. I want something I want. Something pretty.
Harry : Right. Right.
Karen : Sorry I'm late - had to drop off Bernie at rehearsal.
Karen : Right, listen, you keep yourself occupied for ten minutes while I do the boring stuff for our mothers.
jewellery salesman : Looking for anything in particular, sir?
Harry : Yes...ahm. That necklace there… how much is it?
jewellery salesman : It's £270.
Harry : Erm, all right. Er, I'll have it.
jewellery salesman : Lovely. Would you like it...gift-wrapped?
Harry : Yes, all right.
jewellery salesman : Lovely. Let me just pop it in the box. There.
Harry : Look, could we be quite quick?
jewellery salesman : Certainly, sir. Ready in the flashiest of flashes. There.
Harry : That's great.
jewellery salesman : Not quite finished.
Harry : I don't need a bag, I'll put it in my pocket.
jewellery salesman : Oh, this isn't a bag, sir.
Harry : Really?
jewellery salesman : This is so much more than a bag. Ooh!
(the salesman puts dry flowers into the bag)
Harry : Could we be quite quick, please?
jewellery salesman : Prontissimo.
Harry : What's that?
jewellery salesman : A cinnamon stick, sir.
Harry : Actually, I really can't wait.
jewellery salesman : You won't regret it, sir.
Harry : Want a bet?
jewellery salesman : ‘Tis but the work of a moment. There we go. Almost finished.
Harry : Almost finished. Are you gonna dip it in yogurt? Cover it with chocolate buttons?
jewellery salesman : No, sir, we're going to pop it in the Christmas box.
Harry : I don't want a Christmas box.
jewellery salesman : But you wanted it gift-wrapped.
Harry : I did but...
jewellery salesman : The final flourish.
Harry : Can I just pay?
jewellery salesman : All we need now...
Harry : Oh, God.
jewellery salesman : is a sprig of holly…
Harry : No, no, no, no. No bloody holly.
jewellery salesman : But sir...
Harry : Leave it. Leave it, just leave it.
Karen : (Karen comes back) Ooh! Loitering around the jewellery section, I see.
Harry : No. I was just looking around.
Karen : Don't worry. My expectations are not that high after thirteen years of
Mr. Oh-But-You-Always-Love-Scarves…
[Scene #54]
Colin : Hey!
Tony : What are you doing here?
Colin : Had to rent out my flat to pay for my ticket.
Tony : You're not actually going ahead with this genuinely stupid plan?
Colin : Bloody am. Think this back pack is full of clothes? Like hell it is. It is chock-a-block full of condoms.
[Scene #56]
Karen : Explain to me again why you're so late?
Harry : Oh for heaven’s sake, woman - can't a man have any secrets?
(Karen finds the neclace in Harry's pocket and gets happy)
Karen : Well, hurry up, we've been waiting for hours, it's the first ever preview.
Karen : (plays with kids) It was a starry night in ancient Jerusalem and the baby Jesus was in his manger.
Man1 : Sherlock Holmes is not a real detective.
Man2 : (in Russian) Is this the way to the train station?
Man3 : I would like halfa pound of cherries.
woman1 : I would like a one-day travel card.
Man4 : Oh, my God,
Jamie : (in Portuguese) I've got a terrible stomachache. It must have been the prawns.
Man5 : Milton Keynes has many roundabouts.
Jamie : My goodness, this is a very big fish! It tastes delicious!
(song)
♪ All alone on Christmas ♪ Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas
♪ All alone on Christmas ♪ Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas
♪ Tell me I've got to know ♪ Nobody ought to be alone on Christmas
♪ Don't leave me alone ♪